Morning readers, the elections are over, the new MSPs have arrived at Holyrood like excitable, nerve-wracked children on the first day of school. The intake of 64 politicians today — almost half of the 129 total — represents the largest number of new MSPs since the parliament was re-established in 1999.
Robbie cycled past a certain Southside pub on his way home on Friday night to see several MSPs and a large number of campaigners partying into the wee hours. The rest of the weekend was largely spent spade in hand at the allotment, digging up Jerusalem artichokes. He also proved himself to be royally incapable of even the simplest of DIY tasks, as he incorrectly assembled a raised bed no fewer than three times. Calum, meanwhile, enjoyed a free gig (whimsical Kiwi folk music, seeing as you’re asking) at the Kelvingrove tennis club on Saturday.
Onto your briefing, it’s a bit risqué today, so we suggest you strap in…
Glasgow in Brief
🗳️Reform’s 17 new MSPs were celebrating in style on Friday night, being serenaded to the sounds of ‘Yes sir, I can boogie’ at the Glasgow Marriott. Thomas Kerr could be seen dancing with all of six people on the dancefloor, but it was a guest of honour who piqued our interest — and we apologise in advance for the insalubriousness henceforth. Catching our attention was Rangers superfan Emily Linton, better known by her pornographic moniker Lana Wolf. Linton posed for pics with “the gaffer”, Reform Scotland leader Malcolm Offord, and Kerr: “This guy is just what Glasgow needs!”. Linton told her 10,000 TikTok followers: “Party was good, the food wasn’t very vegetarian so I couldn’t eat any. We spoke to a lot of people. A lot of people asked me for photos!” Who does she count as fans among Reform’s cohort then? Kerr of course, as well as his partner Aimee Alexander, and last but not least “the Lord” Offord. By the end of the night, Linton had requested her favourite tune, Simply the Best. No sectarian lyrics this time as “everyone was on their best behaviour” she told her TikTok fans.
The OnlyFans model — who boasts about her “big, blue, glow in the dark stap-on named King Billy” — has some fairly spicy views, having posted on Friday (excuse the language): “Glasgow Southside and Edinburgh Central I hope you enjoy your immigrant detention centres! Fucking cunts” — a reference to a Reform campaign promise to build removal centres solely in Green-voting constituencies. Linton had strong words for the people of Edinburgh for having elected Lorna Slater too, describing the city as “full of retards”. Linton is something of an official Rangers mascot, known to some for her “half time tits”. It’s not all in poor taste though, in 2021 Linton opted not to bear all out of respect for footballing legend Walter Smith. “Sorry if anyone is disappointed but it doesn’t feel right today,” she told her followers.
🧪 Who knew irritable bowels were such big business? A Glasgow biopharmaceutical company, EnteroBiotix, has recently raised £19m to support clinical trials into IBS, which affects as many as one in 10 people. The company develops microbiome therapies for gut health, with this trial exploring the potential of EBX-102-02 as a disease-modifying therapy by restoring gut microbial diversity. The round was led by Thairm Bio and the Scottish National Investment Bank. “Our mission is to redefine the standard of care in gastrointestinal disease, improving the lives of patients with IBS while building a leading global biopharmaceutical company from our base in Scotland,” says founder Dr James McIlroy (whom the Press and Journal once described as the “poo bank entrepreneur”). The company has raised over £65m in investment since it was founded in 2017. Here’s McIlroy making the bold claim that “the interaction between the microbiome and the mind could be the most complicated thing in the universe”.
🧑🤝🧑 We won’t blame you if you chose not to engage with much of our election coverage over the past few weeks. We at The Bell are struck by how disenchanted people are around each election cycle these days; with turnout down 10% from 2021, you wouldn’t be alone. It’s all over now anyway, but things are just about to begin for the new MSPs, who have had but the weekend to digest the news. This morning, they arrived at Holyrood for the first day of business at the new parliament. Trivial matters like who gets which office, getting their security passes, and learning how to submit motions are some of the joys that await the giddy Holyrood debutants, all 64 of them.
In Glasgow, new MSP’s include the SNP’s former city councillor Zen Ghani, along with another former councillor the Greens’ Holly Bruce. Fellow Green Iris Duane will have to take a break from her undergraduate studies and, presumably, hand in her notice for her four days-a-week job (The Bell is awaiting confirmation from Duane). Thomas Kerr of Reform UK is another of the new intake. The councillor for Shettleston has changed his social media bio to ‘Cllr Thomas Kerr MSP’, which would indicate he plans to continue in both roles (given the cost of a by-election, Bruce may opt to do the same).
A full list of your new Glasgow representatives is below, and if you’ve ever wondered where our cutoff for stories is, the constituencies included probably give you a good idea (although this matter is hotly debated in Bell HQ and there are notable exceptions when the stories really warrant it — see Dumbarton’s doggy suicide bridge)
Stories you might have missed
🚌 New bus gate to come into force today outside Goma | Glasgow City Council
🎨 Glasgow hunts for new culture chief as £121,000 role goes up for grabs | The Herald
🏚️ Inside the Carlton Place house that could change things for Glasgow | The Herald
🚢 Billionaire tycoon accuses owners of River Clyde base of blocking key shipbuilding development | Daily Record
👀 What's behind the new graffiti craze with eyes in Glasgow? | BBC News
🌊 The Glasgow streets blighted by water problems since Christmas | BBC News
❄️ Cocaine dealers who sponsored Motherwell FC jailed | The Times, £
🔥 Cops installing spycams in Scotland's 'most firebombed village' | The Sun
Hi, we’re Calum and Robbie, and we run The Bell. If you want more analysis, more investigations, and more good old fashioned story-telling, sign up for a full Bell subscription. You get three editions a week, and we're about to take on a new full time reporter to bring you even more quality Glasgow coverage.
Read/listen/watch: Rain, Pubs, A Home Away From Home: Inside the ‘People Make Glasgow’ Editorial
Sometimes it’s nice to read, listen, and watch something that just makes Glasgow look cool. Photographer Alicia Portillo Vazquez’s new shoot, named People Make Glasgow, features well-known landmarks in the city and model Nasteho Mahamud of Colours Agency Glasgow. Speaking to online arts magazine Title-Mag, Vazquez says she wants Glaswegians “to see the city as something much deeper than what they already think they know”. Vazquez came to Glasgow 11 years ago as an au pair at first to help fund her fashion studies at Glasgow Clyde College. “The city keeps mesmerizing me”, she says in the interview, citing people’s friendliness and welcoming spirit, “it is full of amazing people who are always happy to help”. There’s a nice accompanying Instagram film for the project too, by Director of Photography Samuel Howard. Check it oot.
We also rec:
Catch up and coming up:
- We went to Glasgow’s election count (and spent 10 hours there) on Friday so you didn’t have to. After, we brought you a digestible write up of how it all went down, from “monumental” breakthroughs for parties to the old guard feeling “shite”. Plus, a notable council figure spotted some rudely spoiled ballots: “I’ve already seen two cock and balls”.
Robbie Armstrong
- How about we throw back to a slightly older story if you’re wanting something non-election related to read. If you haven’t already, why not read Kirsty Mackay’s moving reflections after moving back to Glasgow after 30 years away, including some cracking vintage photos.
Kirsty Mackay
Headline of the week
Fury as 'selfish' Lanarkshire BMW owner parks in two spaces at Asda car park | Glasgow Live
Re:view: Ox and Finch; 920 Sauchiehall Street
It would be hard to find a restaurant more oppugnant to Calum’s unified theory of HumbleYum than this Finnieston institution. Small plates: tick. High prices: tick. Tasteful and expensive interior design: tick. Yet since opening in 2014, Jonathan MacDonald — now managing director of Scoop Restaurants Group — has steered a steady ship that’s scarcely if ever seen the standards slip. This is a big achievement in a changeable and turbulent hospitality industry. The clientele might have changed drastically over the course of 12 years, and the food is no longer as novel as it once was, but it remains one of the city’s best spots. As of 2025, Scoop had a turnover of some £15m, employing around 200 people, and also owns Ka Pao, Margo and Sebb’s. It all started here though.
Charred cabbage with smoked almonds and gouda; barbecue sea bream crudo in dashi; roscoff onions with oyster mushrooms and pale ale — the food coming out the open kitchen at O&F remains assured and confident. If it’s less exciting and cool today — it’s probably down to the impact the restaurant has had on the rest of the city’s dining habits. Yes, it’s the dreaded sharing plates format, but you can, like my mum, refuse to share your food with anyone à la Joey Tribianni.—Robbie
Glasgow Calendar: Birds of America
Visit one of the world’s most celebrated and rare books: The Birds of America by John James Audubon at the Royal College of Physicians and Surgeons of Glasgow. Info here.
Article amended 11.05.26 to reflect that Jackson Carlaw in fact lost his seat to Kirsten Oswald in Eastwood.
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