Last Thursday, a request landed in my inbox asking me to look into the “pigeon mascot wars”. Not a phrase one sees everyday.
“In what really should be an episode of Derry Girls, but instead is happening in South Lanarkshire, I just wanted to make sure you’re across this news…”
Opening the email marked the start of an absurd story, featuring a feathery character that could only exist in the West of Scotland or, perhaps, only Rutherglen.
Over the past week, a resident named Diane explained to me, locals have been “laughing but shaking their [sic] heads” as the town has found itself with not one, but two pigeon mascots for its Rutherglen900 celebrations. There is Dougie, the official mascot, designed by a primary school pupil. And then there’s his rival, Proddy, a pigeon in an orange sash created by Rutherglen Bluebell Flute Band, after Dougie was allegedly barred from joining their parade alongside the local Orange Lodge.
It sounds like a joke, but the avian mascots are only the latest flare up in a conflict which has been simmering for months. Yes, there is AI slop imagining Dougie and Proddy throwing fists, or is it wings? Yes, there are accusations of “bigotry”. And yes, this somehow all relates to belonging and identity in Rutherglen in 2026.
But before every great war something happens which, years later, historians point to as the moment the first domino fell — the seemingly insignificant incident that set in motion a chain of events which would lead to the first act of war. In this case: an innocent decision in 2025 to use a little girl’s mascot design to celebrate a town’s birthday.
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